see-through faith

That’s the length of Lent. Forty days of fasting (plus six Sundays). It’s a l-o-n-g time. The same length of time Jesus fasted in the wilderness. It happens to be the same length of time that the main character in a film I saw on Saturday night used to do a love dare to win back his wife, but I digress.

As I mentioned several times now I’m using Maggi Dawn‘s book Giving it Up as a resource to get through Lent. And I’m loving it. (I’m already starting to worry about the withdrawal symptoms after lent. But I digress again!)

The title of the book is misleading though … as one critic put it

The BRF Lent Book … focuses on exploring a different kind of “giving up” for Lent – one that can transform our lives. Maggie Dawn calls us to give up some of our entrenched ideas about God so that we can see Him more clearly. Through a series of daily studies she shows through scripture how people were radically changed by encountering the true God

I highly recommend this book. It’s probabably too late to buy it for this year – but do think about it for next year.

Thinking ahead,  and yes this is yet another aside – I’m probably going to work through her Advent one (over at into the bible) but I’ll give you ample warning about that.

***

Tell me, which character is your favourite in the New Testament?
When I think about that I’d really like to say Jesus, of course, … but to be honest I think it’s Peter who I identify with most.

Maggi writes this about my hero …

“To Peter, it didn’t come naturally to pause, listen, wait, think or worship. The presence of God made him want to act – to make things better, make the place suitable for the presence of God, change the world, change people’s minds (p. 147.)

(Ouch! I’m so like that -at times – that it’s scary!) … She goes on to say

“This wasn’t a fault

phew!

“It was Peter’s personality.

His impulsive nature and his big mouth got him into trouble sometimes, but they also gave him greatest moments of glory

“It was Peter, not John the mystic, who walked on the water,
Peter who got to the beach breakfast first,
Peter to whom Jesus entrusted the keys of the kingdom …

Maggi then concludes this gem by saying

Of course we need mystics and thinkers – … but NOTHING WOULD EVER GET BUILT IF THEY WERE IN CHARGE of OPERATIONS

That’s really challenging reading isn’t it? Particularly for someone like me!

What’s really good – but at the same time really hard about this -  is that maggi doesn’t leave it there. She reminds us that we (all) need to change and learn new patterns of behaviour …  In otherwords, transformation – inside and out – also of our characters, is what having a relationship with our triune God is all about! For me (and Peter, and others like us) the challenge is to “stop jumping, stop talking, stop planning and LISTEN!”.

That reminds me of the tufty club which I belonged to more than forty years ago.

Its slogan was STOP; LOOK AND LISTEN (before you cross the road).

It’s time I started doing that again.
It’s no good whining that it’s hard to hear God right now. I need to STOP. I need to LOOK around and find signs of Him in the everyday ‘normal’. And I need to LISTEN to what He has to say.

Then- and only then- I have to step out in obedience. But first I have to hear.

Just got home from a wonderful silent retreat! God is good. I didn’t find it so easy to hear God or even pray … but what ministered to me this time was the seeking God together in community (we were ten participants) and the feeling of being carried in prayer.

The retreat was very different from the one I was on this time last year. That’s in part because I am in a very different place spiritually, but also because the leaders were different. What I missed most was the silent Holy Communion. That impacted me so deeply last year. But what I got in return this year was the ability to communicate with God through a prayer-dance and movement. That was good. And I picked up a sketch pad and colours too.

Each of us were given a fresh flower (and vase) when we arrived. Over the three days my flower opened right up … I felt it was a prophetic picture of what God is doing in my life. I’ve been closed to everything for a few weeks (because of a huge disappointment) and but slowly I’m learning to relax and open up again – and I’m glad about that. It will still be a roller-coaster ride for some time, but best of all I know I’m not alone. Not only is God with me, but He’s given me fellow pilgrims to journey with me – and for that I’m truly grateful.

That’s always the BIG question for me … what next in and for the Kingdom of God.

Those of you who follow this blog know that I’ve been away from Finland for a couple of weeks in London, most of which has been a museum-shopping extravangza with DD in preparation for her 18th birthday in May. We had a lot of fun but it was exhausting too.

It was Samuel Johnson who said

When a man is tired of

London, he is tired of life.

and I have to agree.

I was in London for two weeks (DD ten days) and while we did something educational every day (a museum or tourist attraction) -as well as a lot of shopping- we barely skimmed the surface. There is so much to see and do still! We did three trips to the British Museum, visited the V&A, and the Natural History (to see the dinosaurs) … rode the London Eye, visited the London Dungeon,saw part of the changing of the guard at Buckingham Palace, Walked along the Thames a lot (especially the South Bank) a lot saw the Houses of Parliament, Big Ben, St Paul’s, visited Southwalk Cathedral, Covent Garden Market etc etc.

For me the highlights have been mostly seeing DD’s face as she’s experienced new things, and also see her gain in confidence in dealing with a big city – she fitted in so well in SW1 and SW3 and mastered the tube pretty quickly even in rush hour! She really is a young adult already and I’m so proud of her!

Her favourite museum was the British Museum (though the guide on Friday when we did the Romans wasn’t up to par!) but I think the Imperial War Museum also had a huge impact on both of us!

There’s a great section about WW2 though kids’ eyes – and given that both my parents were evacuees (dad to Somerset and mum to Sheringham) – I found it really interesting too. A couple of years ago a friend gave our family tickets to the Lion the Witch and the Wardrom (first of CS Lewis’ NARNIA series) and it opens with a bombing raid and then the four kids are evacuated. When in London this time I finally got to see Prince Caspian (on DVD) and as you can see from this trailer … it starts in the tube (at the imaginary ‘Strand’ Station) which made me smile given how much we’ve used the tube and London busses this trip. Thank God for oyster cards and a maximum inner zone fare of about £6 a day!

Also at the Imperial War Museum there is a huge holocaust exhibition. It is really well done and its impact is powerful. There are news clips, interviews from that time and from survivors, interesting things to look at and things that make you cry. DD spent far longer there than either my friend or I expected … and it made a huge impact on her. If any of you visit London this is well-worth doing.

It is true that when one tires of London it’s a sign that one is tired of life … but that said I did come home tired – very tired – in part because of all we’d done, but also becuase there was a transport strike here in Finland yesterday. It meant that there were almost no coaches or local busses   -and I considered myself very fortunate to have got on one back to Turku very late last night after a wait of four hours. I arrived in Turku at 3 am to a welcome committee of hubby and three dogs at Turku cathedral! I’m always glad to see them but was especially so last night!

But what next?

Today’s been invested in being a taxi driver to DD and my inlaws (because of the bus strike), catching up with laundry and re packing my little case. Yes re-packing. I know I must be crazy!!!

I’m off to a silent retreat tonight (for 48 hours) led by Rev Henry Morgan (Anglican) from the UK. I have to admit I desperately need this time with God and am hoping and praying that He’ll show the way forward for me. It’s been a bit tough for me for a few weeks – though I haven’t felt able to blog about it – and to be honest I feel a bit directionless as to what to do now that I have finished my MA in theology in part because the doors that I felt God was opening for me here in Finland have been firmly closed again.

In my bag I have a couple of books (as well as my Bible) The first is Brian McLaren’s new book

which my friend bought for me the day it came out in the UK when we went to hear Brian speak at Oasis (church.co.uk) (don’t you just love their banner heading!!!) … and the second book is one I’m about to read and review. It’s called Restoration Road (by Mitch Kruse) and on the back cover it states

Regardless of where your journey has taken you, whether a sand heart, a stone heart, or a clay heart, your story is not finished. In fact, the next step always provides a new beginning.

Sounds just what I need don’t you think?

Back blogging on Saturday.

PS into the Bible has taken a bit of a break (unintentionally). I just didn’t have time to post while I was away.However, I’ve been reading Maggi Dawn during Lent. Her book Giving it Up is great – very challenging but so inspiring about what it means to be a Christian! Over at her blog last week she wrote

It’s a common misconception that Lent is about self-improvement. … [It]is not about giving up luxuries, not about losing weight or gaining other benefits, not about food per se, not about de-cluttering or Feng Shui or about ay other kind of feel-good, de-toxifying exercise. In the end, it’s about denying yourself some of the essentials of everday life in order to focus on the reality that we depend upon God for life itself; about re-aligning ourselves with God and his purposes in our world; about reminding ourselves that all we have is a gift from God in any case.

(emphasis mine)

When Jesus died on the cross, He was giving “all He had” to pay the price for all the wrong things you’ve ever done. In your heart, for just a moment, would you walk up that hill the Bible calls Skull Hill and stand quietly at the foot of that cross where the Son of God is pouring out His life for you.

Look at Him dying for you!

You are not worthless! But you’ll never know how valuable you are until you give yourself to the One who died to buy you back. Which you could do right now, right where you are.

Ron Hutchcraft

Today is my last intentional fast from the internet on Fridays (though I’m considering whether this is a spiritual discipline I should continue) and today, Good Friday, I present my final Lenten challenge.

You might also like to check out this Good Friday Prayer. Be blessed!

If the longest journey is the journey inward, we need to find our own thin places – places like my favourite chair or a hermitage or a landscape where we can find the presence of God. … we are all pilgrims in search of thin places; if we are too busy for thin places, we need to slow down.

Can’t remember where I read this. But I love it.

Today, let’s try to slow down and find the thin place where the presence of our Heavenly Father can overwhelm us and love us to life.

Fasting from the PC /internet again yesterday was good for me (though not without its struggles. I am coming to the realisation that I spent far too much time I spend on the internet and am thinking that even after Lent I think it would be good for me to cut it out intentionally one evening a week or something, let’s see!

Yesterday’s Lenten Challenge was to take a prayer walk.

I did this later in the evening, joining hubby as he walked the dogs in our local neighbourhood. It was pretty cold out and very slippery but lovely all the same.

Other than our immediate neighbours (three families) it’s not very easy to pray for those who live in our neighbourhood, as I realised that I don’t know any of them very well. That’s probably enough pause for thought in itself!

When we got to the top of the bike path and turned right (that’s all of 300 m from our front door !!) I noticed a little yellow house that I’ve honestly never seen/noticed before. I made the mistake of saying that to hubby, who thought it was hilarious, teased me mercilessly about it and as we continued to walk pointed out all kinds of houses in case I hadn’t noticed them before either! Very helpful!!!

eija commented that she doesn’t do prayer walks, but rather prayer drives. That was a great distinction to make as I’d never thought of the concept of a prayer drive -at least until yesterday that is!

Yesterday evening (before my prayer walk) I ran TS to the cinema in town. He and his girl were going to walk home (about 3km) which is why I drove him down. On our way there I drove along one street quite close to the school in which I’ve been teaching all week – and it sure looks different at night – very different! (The whole city does actually.) In the past there’s been one s-x shop there, but as I was driving I noticed the neon lights advertising that there were at least three now!

It would have been really easy to pray there and then for all the s-x shops in Turku simply to be closed down I guess, but that wasn’t the way I found myself praying. Instead my prayer was that God would meet the owners and overwhelm them. I prayed they would be set free (not simply closed down) by the saving grace of God. And as I prayed my hope was that this would have a ripple effect …  that the people employed there (in whatever capacity) would be changed too – and helped to find alternative jobs. And I also found myself praying for those caught up in the cycle of addiction that makes them frequent these shops – because without customers the shops would not survive!

As if that weren’t enough, my prayers were for the Christians in Turku (myself included) that we could start to befriend and love these people into the Kingdom.

I’ve mentioned this before, but I’ve for the past few weeks I’ve been reading John Burke’s book No Perfect People Allowed . And I have to say that book has had a huge impact on me! The main point of the concept behind Burke’s ministry is that as Christians we have to learn to be less judgemental and instead accept people as they are. His point is that that is how God treats all of us.

Taken to its obvious conclusions this means befriending pr0st1tutes, p1mps, owners of s-x shops and those who struggle with s-xual addictions, and really welcoming them in our fellowship groups and churches. That’s a tall order for most of us isn’t it? Yet, it’s exactly what Jesus did. He hang out with and intentionally spent time eating and drinking and building relationships with prost1tutes, publicans and all the others that the Pharisees dispised. There’s a lesson for you and me in that I believe!

As I said it’s a hard call for us. It means being church in a radically different way to the way most of us go about it today. And I think it’s helpful, at least to me, to be reminded of what Jesus saved me from and what motivate Him to take a risk with me! It’s only as we accept Jesus as Lord and Savious and get to know Him better and allow Him to know us more and more intimately, that we begin to be changed (for the better). I know that’s how it’s worked in my life. But it starts with His acceptance and love – and as Christians our task is to extend that love to the people we meet. More than that we need to get outside our comfort zones and meet people who you and I would never meet in normal circumstances.

My conlusion after I’d wrestled with all this in prayer is that I’m not interested in driving people out of town. I don’t believe that’s God’s way. Nor am I interested in addictions being hidden under the metaphorical carpet so that the town looks clean and nice. What I am interested in is people being set free by God. And I have to admit I feel powerless in knowing what my role is in this, other than praying (which to be really honest feels like a bit of a cop out!). Yet, yesterday I found that praying for our neighbourhood was an awesome thing to do. And I am encouraged by the fact that

the prayer of a person living right with God is something powerful to be reckoned with (Jas 5:17, the Message)

You and I – as Christians – are made righteous by Christ. We don’t get ‘living right with God’ 100% right all of the time.  And that’s ok. He extends His love and grace and acceptance to us anyway … and challenges us to do likewise.

Today is the fourth Friday in Lent – and the fourth Friday I’ll attempt to be without the internet.

(In the interests of honesty/transparency I immediately want to say here that I am obligated to access an on-line computer programme at school tomorrow to note all absences etc. But I am hoping to limit myself to doing only that!)

As in previous weeks the idea behind this fast is simply so that I can focus more intentionally on God during the day (particularly those moments when I crave chatting, checking blogs/facebooketc.) and I have been challenged to try new ways of praying too.

Today’s Lenten Challenge is a simple one – yet a challenge all the same.

Take time to take a walk in your local neighbourhood and pray whatever God puts on your heart.

A friend of mine goes on prayer walks on a regular basis, but I have to confess I haven’t done this in a long, long time.

For those of you who aren’t familiar with the concept – a prayer walk is, I think, simply prayer that is targeted for the place you are walking.

Many of us have a hard time just sitting still in a room praying over a list of people or needs. It’s so easy to be distracted isn’t it? But when we can actually see what we are praying for, rather than sitting at home with our eyes closed imagining it, it’s easier to focus. And it’s actually easier to hear what God is saying too, which in turn makes praying for those who live/work in our neighbourhood sweet!

So my challenge should you chose to accept it is this. Come step out with me tomorrow, and give it a try! And (if you want to) let me know what happens!

There’s always the chance you’ll bump into someone who asks what you are doing! Now if that isn’t an opening from God, I don’t know what is!

No post from me today cos I’m not turning on the computer … (this was posted on Thursday) … but I’ll leave you with the fourth Lenten challenge.

Last Sunday in Turku Cathedral we sang this beautiful song. Listen to it and allow God to meet you  and minister to you wherever you are!

After a day of prayer and fasting I have a new coat!

Seriously this Lenten fast from the computer on Fridays has been very good for me.

• We’ve had a clean house each weekend cos I’ve done the chores on Friday morning
• I’ve had more time to seek God through worship and Bible study
• I’ve been swimming and find that the best place to hear God speak (no interruptions)
• I’ve read something light for FUN
  and
• I’ve gone to bed early!

But yesterday I made the mistake of going to a superstore for our groceries (instead of the local supermarket where I know everyone, and where they only sell essentials so there are practially no temptations (if I avoid the sweets and chocolate aisles!). Anyway to cut a long story short – I ended up buying a new coat. I’m not sure that was at all in the spirit of fasting – but in my defence it was on sale and I used loyalty point to pay for it! I like it a lot -though when DD saw it last night she screwed up her face and said “mum, red makes you look so old” … and then we burst out laughing cos I am old!

Give us our daily bread

What does this mean in our everyday lives?

Are you getting enough?